I hate shoes

I was going to talk about gender again, but I've had a hard week, and at this point, my brain is pretty dead, so I've decided to talk about shoe shopping instead.

I need new shoes. This happens about twice a year, once in fall near the beginning of school when my mom realizes that I have no shoes appropriate for cold weather except for tennis shoes, and once in spring, somewhere around spring break, when my mom realizes that I have no shoes appropriate for warm weather except for flip-flops or Crocs. My mom, as well as many other people are of the opinion that two pairs or extremely casual shoes are not enough to get a person through the year. I, respectfully disagree

Full disclosure here. I hate shoes. If I got my way, I would go barefoot or in just socks all year. Shoes hurt my feet and they're uncomfortable. Yes, all of them. This is why I loved Crocs so much, regardless of how ugly they might be. Really, Crocs aren't shoes they're light pieces of plastic which loosely encase your foot. For a while, I would wear Crocs all year round. But, eventually, Crocs became too hated by society, even for me, someone who's known to completely disregard styles and trends (and not necessarily in a good way).

Power struggles over shoe shopping have been part of my relationship with my mom for as long as I can remember. Since I decided that my then trademark patent leather shoes hurt my feet when I was five, there has been a perpetual struggle to find shoes that she deemed acceptable and I deemed comfortable. The Crocs were just a more recent part of the battle (my mom did not approve of my wearing Crocs everyday). Before that, we had reached a truce over Merrell Moccasins, a clog-esque shoe which was impossible to find in stores.

Really, what it comes down to is that there don't seem to be any shoes that fit my feet well. They make shoes that are wide, shoes that are narrow, shoes that have high heels, shoes without heels, shoes that are completely flat, shoes for flat feet, shoes for high arches, but they don't seem to make shoes for people with tall feet, as in from top to bottom of the foot, and although they do make shoes for people with ankles that collapse in on themselves, these shoes are expensive, clunky, and look like they should belong to an old, retired jogger. As you can see, my choices are rather limited.

So, this weekend, my mom decided that it was time for our biannual shoe shopping trip. Every year, twice a year, these trips happen, and every year twice a year, I buy a new pair of shoes and then refuse to wear them. This year was worse than usual. Not only was there nothing comfortable, but there wasn't even anything that I wanted to try on.

Because most of my clothing consists of loose jeans and loose t-shirts, nicer women's shoes and clogs would look weird, at least in my head. My mom clearly disagreed because most if the shoes that she suggested were block heeled clogs. After the third pair, one would think that she'd get the idea that those weren't what I was looking for. But she kept asking what type of shoe I did want to try on, and the truth was, I didn't want to be trying on any shoes, so I just kept trying her suggestions.

This time, I went home without any new shoes. My mom and I returned form the shopping trip exhausted, disgruntled, and seriously annoyed with each other. I'm betting that after that experience, fun though it was, I'll be off the hook for shoe shopping for another six months. It looks like I'm going back to the Merrell Moccasins. Maybe they'll work again. Who knows?

I'm going to close this post using the same format as my last one--my ideal world. In my ideal world, people would go barefoot. Either that, or there would be different types of socks which had the texture of socks but were thick enough to keep out worms, water and cold. That way, there wouldn't have to be shoes. It would save people a great deal of money on shoes and it would be much more comfortable. I mean, really, some scientists are finding that shoes aren't all that great for your feet anyway. Obviously, based on the amount of garbage on the ground today, what with broken glass and all sorts of other sharp objects, some forms of shoes are necessary to protect feet. Also, there is the issue of worms which enter the body through bare feet, but there are ways to prevent that, either through the aforementioned sock idea or by using a worm repellent medicines (if they have them for dogs, I have the utmost faith that something like that could be created for humans).

I'll just leave you with one final thought. Consider this: What if shoes are created in a way such that once you begin to wear them, your feet come to need them? What if the constricting shapes of shoes makes it increasingly harder for our feet to function without them? What if shoes are really just a mass commercial scheme to get us to all spend money on increasingly decadent coverings for our feet? What if the shoes are really controlling us?